Hitting a Pause on Management 

Heather Cardosi, April 8th, 2024

As a project manager, I often roll out of bed with my first thought being coffee and my second, the projects I have running. At the end of my day, locking my computer doesn’t stop the planning and checking of emails. My phone dings for chats and emails long after my workday has ended, as is the case with many project managers today. This constant always on may be doing more harm than good.

“Research, recently published in the Journal of Applied Psychology, suggests that constantly thinking about work may hurt rather than help your performance as a leader… because it drained their mental resources. Instead, leadership effectiveness was highest on days in which leaders mentally turned off from work the night before and were able to recharge” (Jennings, Gabriel, and Lanaj, 2024, p. 1).

Breaking the always-on habit is easier said than done. Redirecting our brains to other tasks can be difficult, requiring the building of new habits and reactions. The first step is to identify where work should end, and personal times begins.

Establish boundaries between work and home. If you work from home this can be much harder but not impossible. Let your co-workers know that when your day is done, you won’t be replying to email and chat. If you need a critical escalation point, then have them Call or Text for an emergency, then establish what can be considered an emergency. If you are going out of office for PTO, set a backup and notify your stakeholders of who to contact.  

Find ways to detach. Once correct expectations have been set, find ways to stop the notifications so they don’t undermine your efforts. Snooze alerts on your cell phone and make a rule you do not open your chat or email.

Use your time for you. Do family activities, run a load of laundry, hit the gym, or even relax with a book. Ensuring personal time is used in ways that are personally rewarding allow for better focus when work time resumes. Competing priorities are lessened as family, household responsibilities and your physical and mental health have each had time to be addressed.

The above won’t solve everything, but taking personal time every day will help lower stress levels and refresh the mind. When stress levels are lower, the ability to mentally pivot increases and the likelihood to react without though lessens. Be willing to put a pause on project management to see just how much of a positive impact it can be. 

References:

Jennings, Ramy; Gabrial, Allison; Lanaj, Klodiana. “Want to Be a Better Leader? Stop Thinking About Work After Hours.” Harvard Business Review,  3 January 2024, https://hbr.org/2024/01/want-to-be-a-better-leader-stop-thinking-about-work-after-hours?ab=HP-topics-text-15

After a long day of work, you sit back and think of everything you accomplished. You fed the kids, got them to school and activities and even helped them with their homework. You are a great parent!

You helped your partner cook and clean. Even took the time to talk to them about their day and any rough times they had. You are a great partner!

Your boss sent you a bonus check and announced how awesome you did on that account project you finally closed after months of hard work. You are a great employee!

So why are you unhappy and feel stuck or lost? Let’s look back at the prior thoughts. Great parent, partner, and employee. What could possibly be missing? What happened to being a great you?  Often, we get stuck focusing on the roles we play, parent/partner/employee, and forget about the person behind the role. We get this idea if we successfully completed these tasks, we are successful and thus happy… right?

Make a list of you.

Stop and take some time to write a list, on paper or digital, of the things that make you, you. Go ahead and take just 5 minutes and do that now with a few of the below suggestions.

• Twenty activities you enjoy, big or small.
• What makes you relax or how you reward yourself.
• What interests you have, even if it is just a favorite color or that amazing hat you saw last week on Pinterest.

 OK. List in hand. Now read through the list and see how many you have done in the last day. How about week? Month? If you haven’t done at least one every other day, you might have found part of the problem. Not taking the time for yourself can result in a loss of who we are as a person.

Put yourself first.

Reviewing the list again, plan in just one item, every other day. It could be having a quiet cup of tea in the morning, or a short break while working to walk outside for 5 minutes. Even wearing that hat that doesn’t really match anything but makes you feel good. What it is doesn’t matter, only that it means something to you. Continue for just two weeks then take the time to reflect. How do you feel now? As you change, be willing to revise the list or toss it out and re-create it. Doing so is a great way to learn more about yourself and find what makes you, you.

By Heather Cardosi

January 6th, 2024

“Cultivating psychological safety within the project team by creating trust and setting the ground rules for all the team members is critical for project success,” says Martinez Gonzalez. “It will encourage innovation, reduce risks by increasing transparency, and drive internal accountability.”¹

Psychological safety refers to the ability to speak up without fear of reprimand or humiliation. Stepping forward to share ideas and potential solutions creates moments of vulnerability, and as a project manager, it is your job to cultivate that vulnerable moment. Sharing those moments enables teams to find each other's strengths, which, when used together, closes the window of team failure.

A good starting point is to ensure team members learn about each other through a team meeting. Conduct this in person if possible. Otherwise, use a virtual meeting, asking everyone to have their cameras on and all other windows closed. They need to give their full attention to the meeting. No multi-tasking allowed. Dedicate the meeting to team bonding, starting the meeting with an explanation of why you are all there, and then actually start the conversation. 

Start talking about yourself, only briefly touch on technical skills, focusing on life outside of work. Where do you come from? What family might you have? Share at least one strength and one weakness.  Be willing to be the first vulnerable person in the room. Doing so not only shows your team what you are asking them to do, it shows them you are a person too. You are a part of the team, not just its leader.  Then, ask that they do the same. Giving them your full attention shows you value their words and experiences. You see them. 

As team members hear what each other has to say, they will start to understand who their team member is as a person. What have they gone through, and why they might react in a certain way. Seeing each other as people and not just skill sets or task assignments. 

Your ability to lead the team will also grow. A better understanding of your team's people will help you craft ground rules and identify better communication strategies. What may have seemed as intentionally obstructive behavior prior may now be realized as someone who has trouble handling change and needs a little additional help. Maybe you were saying something they were taking the wrong way and feeling defensive.  

These are all possibilities that wouldn't be noticed if everyone hadn't taken the time to be vulnerable. Learning from each other that it is OK to be seen and heard. That together, with your guidance, the team is safe, strong, and capable.

References